Majoring on Minors (Holidays, that is)

You often hear advice on parenting or career or just life saying "don't major on the minors," that is, keep your priorities right and don't focus too much on little things that don't matter. As I indulged my desire to decorate and craft and plan for yet another minor holiday, I realized that I love to major on minors—when it comes to fun "Hallmark" holidays, special events like the Olympics, or just a random Sunday afternoon. Making a big deal of little holidays is a ripe opportunity for family fun and making memories, and those are majors in our house.

Kate got really into decorating for Valentine's Day (maybe because I let her stay up to do it), so we are all decked out, from the dining room table where we'll enjoy a "fancy" family dinner tonight, to the wreath and garland on the mantle, to the balloon "chandelier" hanging from the ceiling fan.

Kate thrilled my mama heart a couple weeks ago when she told Matt, "I don't need my coat—winter is over. It's Valentine's now!" The fact that she is telling the seasons from our holiday decor amused me to death. True—we took down all the blue and silver stuff from her Winter Wonderland birthday party and put up hearts and red ribbon—the seasons must have changed!

I like to write something motivating on the white board in the kitchen, so this month, it was a Dixie Chicks lyric that I consider a pretty good motto for life: "if there's ever an answer, it's more love." It applies in any situation—what's the most loving response?

 

As the big V-day has drawn closer, we've done some artwork, donned our pink and heart-laden clothes. . .

. . . and of course gotten our valentines ready for the class parties!

Since the girls got lots of new crayons for Christmas, I decided it was time to do a purge of the old ones and make use of them by making melted crayon hearts again this year. (We did this for Kate's class two years ago, but I think only two of the kids are the same, and they probably wouldn't remember anyway!)

 

Last night, we bagged them up with some little juju hearts and crayon-shaped tags that say "You color my world, Valentine!"

Kate wrote her name and the names of her friends while Claire scribbled on hers and I wrote the names.

We also made a little valentine for BGC's parents, who we saw this morning at her appointment to get fitted for hearing aids. (Her hearing loss is severe, so these should really help her get talking!)

This morning, I did Kate's hair with this fun heart flip-do I saw on Pinterest, and we had heart-shaped pancakes.

Looking forward to our fun family dinner tonight, followed by a bottle of vino and season 2 of "House of Cards" for Matt and I after bedtime!

I love the quote, "Enjoy the little things, for one day you'll look back and realize they were the big things." I hope our "major" celebrations for "minor" holidays fall into that category for the girls, and that when they look back on their childhoods, they remember all the fun and love we shared—not just in the big things like Christmas and birthday and vacations, but in the little things as well.

Salon Sistahs

Both my girls paid a visit to the salon this evening. Claire, as I mentioned in her 15 month milestones, was much in need of her first haircut, and since tonight was the Valentine's daddy-daughter dance at the Williamson County Rec Center, I thought Kate would enjoy a fancy hairdo as well.

We go to a fun kids' salon called Divas and Dudes, where even ordinary haircuts are accompanied by a special braid, glittery hairspray, and a lollipop, so of course they make a big deal of first haircuts. As we crossed the parking lot and I pointed out the sign, Kate and I had the following conversation:

Kate: "Am I a diva or a dude?"
Me: "You're a dude."
Kate: "What's a dude?"
Me: "A really cool person."
Kate: "Oh!"

I'm glad she didn't ask me what a diva was, since I'm not sure what I would say. I have a complicated relationship with the sparkly pinkification of girlhood these days. (The aforementioned dance was actually called the "Daddy's Lil' Princess Ball," I believe, a fact we made little of.) It's complicated because I enjoy the hairbows and tea parties and other girly stuff (I desperately wanted daughters, after all!) but I don't like this commercialized obsession with princesses and miniature pop stars and pink everything.

Back to the point, though... Kate had a lovely time at our family salon appointment.
Claire. Did. Not.

She's been even more attached than usual lately, and seemed to be having some teething discomfort today. I rarely use the term "hot mess," but that was kind of Claire today. She wanted to comfort-nurse practically every half hour, and had a screaming, snotty fit if I did not oblige immediately.

So as soon as she realized this haircutting procedure could not be done while attached to Mommy, she wanted no part of it. (In retrospect, I should have suggested holding her on my lap while getting the cut, but I didn't think of that. Kate had zero trouble at her own first haircut, so I was really not expecting this. Though I should have, knowing them both.) Matt likes to tell the story of how he wailed so uncontrollably during his first haircut, his mom went into labor, and that's how his brother got here.

Claire was fine once back in my arms, of course, and she got her little tiara and special "first haircut" certificate with lock of hair. Her lock of hair looks as dark as mine, though I generally think of her hair as a bit more like golden-straw. Our family of brunettes gets progressively lighter, the younger we go.

And then there's Kate, who through all the trauma her sister was experiencing in the chair opposite her was quiet and compliant as the hairdresser gave her french braids on the sides, joining in a bun in the back.

With her cute little hairdo, I thought she looked a little like Marta or Gretl from The Sound of Music.

So as to avoid Kate falling asleep in the car during an afternoon car ride (and thus, messing up the hair) we decided to make our salon trip right before the dance. So Daddy in his lavender shirt and purple tie, and Kate in her raspberry dress and raspberry tights, headed off to the dance and Claire and I headed home for... more compulsive nursing.

Matt is such a great dad, and I love how he loves his girls and cherishes time with them. I remember sitting in the pediatrician's office with him when Kate was just a teeny infant, and I saw an ad for a daddy-daughter tea party or some such thing in a local magazine in the waiting room. I pointed it out to him, not sure if he would be into something like that or not. "Oh, hell yeah," he said. He couldn't wait to do stuff like that with his sweet daughter, and that baby—now such a big girl, it seems—absolutely has him wrapped around her little finger. Both these girls are so lucky to have such a devoted daddy.

Oh, and by the way, all the girls at the dance got a little tiara, so this post might also be called, "How an Anti-Princess Mom Allowed Both Daughters to Get Tiaras in One Evening."

via Matt's Facebook, at the dance

Our Love Story Linkup

I'm notoriously into celebrating holidays small and large. And, I love responding to questionnaires! So I jumped at the idea of this linkup on From Mrs. to Mama's blog.

1. How long have you and your significant other been together?

8 1/2 years. Wow. That's getting frighteningly close to the 10-year/one-third of our lives mark. Eek! 

2. How did you meet? {What's your "love" story?}

We met Aug. 24, 2003--the day I moved to Nashville. Our orientation at Vanderbilt Divinity School began with a salad supper in the Refectory, which included some welcome talks from the deans and some get-to-know-you games. We met during a game of People Bingo. Matt approached me and we introduced ourselves. I could tell he was interested in me, so I decided to be coy when he offered to sign my bingo sheet. "I've already got five in a row," I said. "I don't need you!"

That was a Sunday night. We chatted at various gatherings that week, and at a party on Friday night, he asked if I wanted to "hang out" Saturday night. I assumed "hang out" meant pizza and movie at his apartment, but when he called to finalize the time, he said he was taking me to dinner at the Opryland Hotel. That was a "date-date," and it was a really great first date. It was while sitting on a bench in one of the hotel's conservatories that we discovered how much we had in common and really connected.

We spent tons of time together over the next six weeks or so, which then got overwhelming. We "took a break" from mid-October 2003 until March 2004, during which time I casually dated someone else and Matt and I became best friends. Our more-than-friends-ness became the elephant in the room by February, and the day I told Matt I'd broken up with the other guy and asked him to be my date for the upcoming Divinity School Gala was the beginning of the rest of our lives, since we knew that getting back together was "for good."

3. If married, how long have you been married? If not, is this the guy you hope to marry? {do tell}
We got engaged in November 2005 and married October 14, 2006. So that's almost 5 1/2 years now!

4. If you are married, where did you get married? Big or small wedding?  If not, where would you like to get married? And will it be big or small?

Our wedding was in Louisville at St. Paul UMC, with a dinner-and-dancing reception at the Brown Hotel. It was pretty big, and just fabulous!

5. Do you have any nick-names that you call one another? Do share!

Nothing in particular. Baby. Sweetie. Dear. We try to be intentional sometimes about calling each other by our names. It feels more intimate than nicknames sometimes, don't you think? 

6. Name 3 things you love most about your honey.

He's selfless, patient, and and loves me in spite of my flaws. (That's all one, that goes under the heading of "great husband!")
He is such a great father. He would do absolutely anything for his girls, takes Kate on special "daddy-daughter dates," and is very intentional in his words and actions with her.
He's a great pastor. Yes, I often wish he had a "normal job" (i.e. 9-to-5 with weekends free!) but I also really admire his work in ministry, the way he cares for people and helps people grow closer to God. It is not a job for the faint of heart!

Super-Daddy!

7. Tell us how he proposed? Or your ideal proposal?

Matt hid the ring inside a matryoshka—a Russian nesting doll—since I love all things Russian. He brought it to my apartment as a "housewarming gift," since I was about to move into the duplex that we had picked out together to be our first home when we got married (so obviously, I knew a proposal was coming sometime!) As I oohed and ahhed over the gift and opened the doll's layers, revealing the story of the Ugly Duckling (a personal favorite and somewhat of an inside joke!) it suddenly dawned on me this might be his proposal. When I got down to the smallest doll that could still fit a ring inside, I tried to discreetly shake it to see if there was anything inside. I didn't hear anything, so I thought "ok, no, this isn't it." I opened it to see a princess-cut diamond ring nestled in tissue paper to keep it from rattling, since he knew I would shake it—just like he knew I would poke around his apartment for a ring and therefore hid it at his friend's place!

V-day 2011 in the Clarksville parsonage

8. Is he a flowers and teddy bear kind of guy for v-day, or strawberries, champagne, and rose petals?
Sometimes he has brought flowers home, and he makes sure we have wine in the house, but we usually just mutually decide to go out for dinner or to cook Italian food (our favorite) at home. When we go all out, our Italian feasts include caprese (tomatoes and mozzarella cheese), bread with dipping oil, pasta, and wine. Heavenly!

9. Are you a sunset dinner on the beach kind of girl, or pop a movie in and relax on the couch?
We're not huge beach people, though I do enjoy a nice dinner anywhere. We definitely enjoy curling up to watch movies or TV shows we missed. 

10. Tell us one thing you'd like to do with your significant other one day. If you could do anything? Go anywhere?
We dream of living abroad for a while, even if it's just a month or two. We want to experience another culture as residents as opposed to tourists, renting an apartment and going grocery shopping, etc. We think it would be great for our kids to experience another culture in that way as well. (And that is actually probably a less stressful way to take kids abroad than dealing with hotels and restaurants all the time!)

11. Tell us what you plan on doing on this Valentine's Day.
We're going out this Friday night—avoid the Feb. 14th rush! (Plus, weeknights are always busy for us anyway!)

Me on our V-day date, pre-kids (2008)

12. Are you asking for anything this Valentine's day?
No, we don't do gifts for V-day or anniversaries. Just cards sometimes. Last year, I asked him to write me a love note. After balking at my romanticism at first, he ended up writing notes to me, to Kate, and to "Baby Kelley #2," who we didn't even know for sure existed yet!—Valentine's fell during the few weeks between "trying" and taking the pregnancy test. Sure enough, Claire was in there, so now we have a sweet note for the baby book, showing how we loved her even before we knew her!

13. Give us one piece of advice of keeping a relationship strong and full of love.
Just sit and talk. In that precious hour or two between getting the kids to bed and hitting the hay myself (since I can't stay up with Rev. Night-Owl) we too often sit glued to our respective laptops, only interacting to share something funny or interesting we're reading. If we do try to do something together, we generally fall back on the evening entertainment from our pre-parenthood days, "should we watch a movie or play a game?" It really brings us together to just sit on the couch with no screens on and TALK!

14.  Show us a picture of what love means to you.

Family cuddle!!!

This whole exercise (rather, the attempt to illustrate it) has shown me just how hard it is a) to find photos of oneself from the pre-digital camera days, and b) to find photos of Matt and I together without kids from the days since becoming parents. Note to self: need to take more "couple" pics!

Happy Valentine's Day, all! 

My Snowy Valentine

This week we experienced our fifth or sixth snow of the winter (I've lost count). Thursday was the second time they actually closed the office, and Friday morning marked about the eighth time they've opened late or closed early due to icy conditions. It took me three hours to get home Wednesday night. It usually takes about one (or, with no traffic, a little less than one hour). It was crazy, and since Matt was also down in Nashville when the snow hit, it took him two hours to get back up to Clarksville and get Kate, whose day care closed two hours early, and one hour earlier than he was actually able to get there. It was bad. And yet, I have heard stories from people who usually take only 20-30 minutes to get home taking three hours as well (more surface streets) so I guess I was lucky at least to be on the interstate and traveling at least part of the way before dark fell.

Anyway, I'd say we in Tennessee (and the whole South, really... what's that? the Northeast too? yeah, everybody) are quite ready for this snowy winter to be over!

While we are under no delusion it's the end, today feels remarkably spring-like! There's still some snow on the ground, but it's about 50 degrees and sunny. Kate and I even went outside to play without any coats on. Enough of the yard was snow-free that Kate could play on her swing and slide, and we sat for a while on the driveway and sang songs. (For the record, "Twinkle, Twinkle" is the first song Kate actually sings along with me, not just doing the hand motions.)

Decked out in a pink, ruffly sweater dress for Valentine's weekend, Kate enjoyed the sunny, snowy, pseudo-spring day (and I did too).

Happy Valentine's Day!

Project Life (Valentine's Week)

I like holidays. Even little ones. I make homemade decorations and festive meals and wear clothes in the holiday's "official" colors.

So, this was Valentine's Week in our house. I wore red and pink (as did Kate) and made valentines by hand and used my new Photoshop skills to make a fun digital valentine. So sue me :0)

Monday 2/8: This is our mantle. I made the heart garland a couple years ago. Sometimes it hangs over our bed, and sometimes on the mantle. The mantle (and house in general) looked so bare after I took down Kate's b-day party decorations, the den needed a little something. Tuesday 2/9: We had our third snow of the year, and as usual, I was obsessive about figuring out the road conditions. This was about 6:50 in the morning. Matt was outside taking pictures of the snow and brushing off the DirecTV dish with a broom (so that I could watch the local news reports) when I trudged out in a sweatshirt and boots over my paisley pajamas to check the street's ice-to-snow ratio.

Wednesday 2/10: Kate has been fussy a lot lately because of her molars coming in. She didn't want to go to bed, but just sat and cuddled with me for a while. She doesn't often sit still, so it was a precious moment. After ten minutes or so, when I said "Are you ready to get in bed?" and gestured to her crib, she sat straight up on my lap, and when I sat her down in her crib, she laid right down and went to sleep.

Thursday 2/11: I took a three-hour Photoshop class through a local community education program. I took some design classes a couple years ago, and learned Illustrator and InDesign pretty well, but I'd only dabbled in Photoshop, and really wanted to learn. It was a great class!

At left, I turned an ordinary day on Lake Geneva into a gorgeous afternoon in Cozumel! At right, I made some improvements on an awkward family shot from Kate's birthday. I know this isn't "Highlights for Children," but can you spot the five changes? :0)

Friday 2/12: Kate had a little Valentine party at school. She brought home a lot of loot! (Well, the polka-dotted bag was from Granna and Opa, but still...) She loves playing with paper, so greeting cards and valentines were right up her alley.

Saturday 2/13: Matt and I went out for a Valentine's date at a Japanese hibachi restaurant, but the only pic was a bad one from my cell. During the day, though, we just hung out at home with Kate. (All Saturdays are special because of that!) Here, Kate is sitting on her stool that Popi made her, playing with her block-box (she likes to take the lid off and put it back on, over and over), and making a funny face.

Sunday 2/14: After church, I made grilled cheese sandwiches cut into heart shapes. I was super-proud of my Martha Stewartiness, but I think this is about where my cheeseballsiness hits its limit.

Fortunately, it was the last day of V-week, and I don't go near as crazy for St. Patrick's Day.

Be Mine

Handmade Valentines

I thought Kate would be in kindergarten before I was doing craft projects for her school, but I ended up making eleven valentines for the one year olds' valentine exchange. My goodness.

Yes, it seems silly, but it seemed sillier to spend $5 on a box of Dora the Explorer valentines when I could just make some with craft supplies I already had. But, being me, I couldn't just fold a piece of paper in half, write "Happy Valentine's Day" and be done with it, so I thought I'd share the cute and creative--yet easy--valentines I made.

Start by making a template with a rectantular piece of paper or cardstock. Fold it in half and cut a half-heart shape in the side, so that when you unfold it, you have a rectangle with two half-heart "ears." Cut out as many of these as you need in a fun, valentine-y paper. On each one, cut a notch along each side, as if you were going to cut the half-hearts off, but only go halfway. On one side, start at the top; on the other, start at the bottom. (as indicated below)
Bring the half-hearts together and slide the notches together to form one heart.
Flatten and crease the edges so that the heart is centered on top. (Or, if you were doing a longer rectangle, it could be off-center. That might look cool. Mine were square when finished, though.)
I knocked these out in less than an hour, and I think they're super-cute!

I kept having flash-forwards to late nights in 2017 when I'm losing sleep putting the finishing touches on a diarama of an early Cherokee village or making ladybug costumes for the class play. I'm sure one day I will regret making myself known as the "crafty mom" of the classroom, but for now, it's just another joy of mommyhood.